Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
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