Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
The adults are the big ones right?
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
Randomize
