Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
one word: firstdatebathroomanal
My girlfriend figured out who you are.
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
Randomize
