Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
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