so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Randomize
