dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
Randomize