Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Randomize
