I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
Randomize