she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Randomize
