More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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