We won't sleep together?
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Randomize
