you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
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