I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
We are two peas in an std pod
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
