Three words: puerto rican gang bang
I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
i think i have herpe
just one?
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
our cab driver is having phone sex.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
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