Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
Randomize