i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
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