I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Randomize
