Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
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