I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
Randomize
