then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
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