So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
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