she smelled like a LAN party
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
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