You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
BRING THE BAGELS
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
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