i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
Randomize
