I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
Randomize
