felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
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