He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Randomize
