Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
Randomize
