And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
Randomize
