Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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