4 words: hood of his car
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
just imagine me sitting naked on a toilet with a fully-clothed dude i havent seen in 2 years, trying to make normal conversation except that im covered in blood and he's helping wipe me down while i try not to pass out because blood makes me NERVOUS. And he's apologizing and i'm apologizing.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize
