Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
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