dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
Randomize
