That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
i need to put some appletini on your dick
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
hi, I love you... and I'm sorry your floor is covered in popcorn, your cabinet is broken, all your alcohol is gone, you're 80 dollars poorer, everything in your bedside table is soaked in beer, austin slept in your bed in those disgusting underwear, I made out with your toilet seat, and for talking to your mom with a four loko in my hand
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
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