she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
Watching her eat just hurts me
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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