Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
There is a man on the balcony beside me who claims he is a triceratops. He roared and asked me for a cigarette, telling me he'd eat me if I refused. I love college.
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
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