the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
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