Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
we can add 'stealing hydrangeas from the sign in front of the credit union because we're too poor to have all of the flower arrangements professionally done' to my list of maybe-felonies
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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