do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
Randomize