Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Randomize
