she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
Ketchup is God's man juice
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
