Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize
