I think scott just propositioned me for sex
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize