Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
Randomize
