I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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