Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
