Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
Randomize
