i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
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