Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
Randomize
