hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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